I am happy this week because we kicked publishing to the curb and took things into our own hands. I am not good with waiting, especially waiting with no end date (and welcome to publishing). So I’m watching Bob practice a skill I don’t have while working on a skill I do have (copy editing) and I’m a happy camper.
What made you happy this week?
Pre ordering the books made me happy.
Also attending the baby shower of a niece who is having twins in a few weeks. She has been estranged from the family many years. Last fall she reached out for the first time and while the path is long, the steps back to reconciliation are sweet.
What’s making me happy today is exploring Kingston for the weekend with my nephew who is going into law school here, his brother, his girlfriend and his mom. We took a ghost trolley ride last night. Everything is tourist expensive here but they’ve fallen in love with the city so my work is complete. My brother arrives from Vancouver this afternoon for my nephew’s undergrad convocation from U of T. Pray to the Goddess of Family Harmony that we all get along and that the subjects of COVID, the election in the US and the war in the Ukraine do not come up…
This week what’s making me happy is actually feeling better, finally.
I’ve had mystery exhaustion since last weekend, simply could not wake up. But yesterday, I woke up and was awake! All night.
So I promptly decided that I needed a weekend off to relax and recover from my week of sleep. And realign my circadian rhythms.
It’s been a very long time since I had a week off, and it just occurred to me that that may have been the problem…!
Pre ordering your trilogy made me very happy.
I get that, sometimes due to stress from work, I don’t get ill, but the second I get time off, my body relaxes and makes me pay for powering through just to work. That holiday week, I couldn’t get out of bed and spent 10 hours daily sleeping/resting. Your body decided it needed bed rest, probably due to accumulated sleep debt among other factors and didn’t give you a choice. Take care, your body is warning you this time
I am starting my daily check for your new series to be published in paperback! So far, it’s only listed in Kindle (which I’ll buy if I absolutely HAVE to), but holding onto excited anticipation. Will keep checking through early July before I cave in. 😉
I think Bob said the PB won’t be available/listed until publication week (though I might be wrong — you can check yesterday’s post I think), just to save you some time/trouble 🙂
The paperback will be out a bit before the eBooks go live. Amazon doesn’t allow pre-orders of print books. We’ll post here when the print goes live.
Getting through my checklist of things to have done before Tuesday, when my other eye will be “fixed”, is making me happy. I realized last night, playing with my little black cat, that trimming the needle claws should be on that list, while my nearsighted eye still works. It is taking a while for the new far-seeing correction to firm up in the other eye. They tell me it is progressing normally. After Tuesday, I won’t be able to use my bifocals to see with the second eye, and they have been giving me clearer sight than the insert, so far. This is worrying.
The air is clearer, and being outside is an option again, but it is raining, as well. The day lilies are blooming, and so are the coreopsis and the columbine. Flowers make me happy.
I’m feeling weirdly good even though I am feeling so worksad. The few positives at work do not seem enough to outweigh the many negatives. But to leave govt employment “In this economy” seems foolish. So I am reaching out to friends in other fields so see how to pitch my (full and varied) CV to their respective industries etc. Then I’ll change it, and start applying.
I’m happy that I have started the exercises myself, and connected people to “The Workout Witch” on IG or YouTube. Lots of positive effects reported.
What or who is the Workout Witch?
It seems to be on YouTube. I’m not sure about instagram — IG is a foreign country to me.
–https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t-zMN-Cz4uU
of course Deborah you would ask this question lol!
I’m happy because we’re making some actual progress around here. It may be small, baby steps, but it’s progress after feeling stalled out for a long time. Also I have Lavender to look forward to reading soon. So much progress!
Also on the “happy about preordering books wagon”. Actually, so many of us, we will need a larger conveyance!
Happy to have done a good job taking care of sisters cats. Also happy this is the last day.
Happy boss will be gone Monday so will have a peaceful work day.
Happy to have eaten baked goods. Strangely, actually happy that they weren’t better so no regrets about not eating more of them.
Happy that I am planning a quiet day, hoping my one zoom call is not too annoying (though happy that my cheap headset solved my sound problems) and looking forward to feta cheese omelets later in the day.
Feeling thankful for this community that always makes a bright spot in the day.
Happiness is the smoke clearing after a couple of days of hardly being able to leave the house, and then some actual rain (even though it drove away the “it’s the final day” workmen, so they’ll have to finish up on Thursday instead). The rain made my garden and yard happy too.
I have some gorgeous flowers blooming in the yard (there’s a huge rhododendron at the end of the driveway covered with happy bees, and a late lilac in the back yard that had a butterfly on it, as well as irises and Russian sage around the garden pond). They make my heart happy, as well as the pollinators. https://www.instagram.com/p/CtU_070u7X7/
There was a lot of not so happy last week, so it is nice to have some reasons to be happy.
Lovely flowers–my mom had rhododendrons, and I miss them!
An inch and a half of rain in the last thirty-six hours. My garden is happy, too! (We only had one day of air quality alerts from the smoke down here but it was very very dry.)
Getting something done = returning the pre-publication proof for my next novel from JMS, and getting the Kickstarter launch / promo stuff for Club Q benefit anthology from Amphibian Press. My new story ‘Speaking of Happiness’ is included. 🙂 The project title is ‘We Came to Dance.’ <3
Yes!
Happiness is a good set of telescoping back scratchers.
My former housemate gave me one of those and it is The Best Thing Ever.
They came in sets of three for $4.99 (5.25 including US sails tax) and after I used mine once I bought another set for the dotter. That should be enough for the whole family.
Happy that when a friend broke her wrist (not a happy), another friend knew dozens of people who’d broken their wrists recently (also not happies), so she was able to tell me what doodads were life-changingly good tools for recovery (arm support wedge and shower sleeve to cover the cast), so I could get them for the friend instead of getting generic “get well” stuff. (If you ever know anyone with a broken wrist — the support wedges that prop the arm up so the wrist is higher than the elbow and take pressure off the wrist, easily found online for post-surgery — are apparently a HUGE benefit for comfort during recovery, and surgeons are unlikely to warn patients to get one.)
Something I could have used an embarrassing number of times!
I’m happy because I’m going to Boston with friends tomorrow to see the Glass Flowers at the Harvard Museum of Natural History. And on Friday friends are coming over for lunch.
Brilliant. Pre-ordered. Thank you both.
The smoke from the Quebec forest fires has cleared out so air quality is back to normal. Fewer headaches/migraines which is always good. Plus able to get outside and plant my seedlings before they croak.
Finding a pair of purple sandals made me happy. Added bonus: they coordinate with a dress I bought for a family occasion this summer. And they show off my manicure done in pride colours.
Peonies are in bloom which is joy-inducing. The cooler temps and lack of rain help the blooms longer. I’m particularly fond of the deep coral but I love any colour of peony.
Finally, I made a crostini with goat cheese, rhubarb chutney and mint for my book club meeting. Rhubarb chutney is easy to make and slight tartness offsets the sweetness of the goatcheese. The mint pulls it all together. I’ll be making more chutney.
Ooh, that sounds good — the rhubarb chutney, I mean. Do you have a link to an online recipe? Or could you share the basics here? (I’m pretty experienced at jams, etc., so don’t need too many details beyond ingredients and anything that needs cooking separately.) I searched online, but the recipes are too varied (one has cherries in it!) to really know where to start. My rhubarb plants (last I looked) are productive this year after several mediocre years.
Here’s the link to the recipe I used https://www.carolinescooking.com/rhubarb-chutney/
I left out the raisins and used honey instead of sugar (1/4 c +1 tbs – depends on how sweet you want it; I wanted a hint of tartness). I also added a 1/4 tsp dried coriander and a pinch each of cayenne and chili pepper.
It’s a pedicure, not a manicure. Apparently I’m confused about fingers and toes.
Thanks!
I think we need a pic of the manicure.
Happy to have new books coming from Jenny and Bob! Also, a friend had her first novel published, at 81, and I have a pre-pub copy. Happy is being nearly done with what will be the final freelance project. I’d not expected to retire yet, but the more I think on it, the happier I am. Also, got a flat of flowers on sale, ready to go in pots once the rain stops.
Can you put up a link to your friend’s novel? My mother (who has been writing for years and is actually very good) is still trying at 85 to get her first novel published. I’d like to be able to give her an example of someone older who did that.
Happiness was all the gardening I’ve done this week. Saving my hosta by moving and sheltering it under the shade of the lilac and rhododendron, out of the late afternoon heat. Poor baby. Wandering around the gardens looking to tweak for the better. Not happy to discover a couple of missing garden items. Letting it go. Found a metal fixture for Black eyed Susan plants. Filled almost all the planters given and my own. Heading back to Harris nursery for more plants. I’ve bought more perennials. Nana’s large pot will be filled with wild flowers. At Nana’s celebration, we were given hearts pressed with wild flower seeds. Planting today. Happiness is enjoying a garden on my balcony/deck and looking at the back garden. Still much to do in the gardens. Started the Swedish death clean out thing. Very taunting.
Goes w/o saying there are three new books to read.
I’m happy I got to pre-order your three books. I really look forward to your self publishing story. I finish the edits on Lord Byron‘s daughter (I think )
I was doing the read aloud on my iPad. And I made corrections on my iPad. And I thought when I went in to do the edits on my PC I was in the same file. Now I’m sure I was not. So I think I have to do another reading listen before I just to say that the edits are done.
Other happiness. Apparently, Amazon Freevee is doing some kind of an event for jury duty and they’ve offered to send a car for me. They have an invited all the cast members. This is very mysterious and exciting. I’m not sure why I was invited, but I will take it, I know my character is popular. I was in Portos restaurant in Burbank the other day and a fan sent chocolate chip cookies to my table. That has never happened before imagine I got rewarded with chocolate chip cookies. Delicious ones also, I went to see the incredibly wonderful musical six the other night at the Pantages theater And several people asked for pictures with me. It is both weird, exciting and somewhat embarrassing. I know the general feeling about actors is that we got into it to show off. That’s not a truth. I know I got into it because of the opportunity to slip inside a character and be someone else. Which is of course why I write too. And since many of you are riders, you probably have much the same reaction. Happy Sunday.
I saw you in Jury Duty and your character is worth remembering. Makes me wonder if a jury member has ever lain on the floor with their legs holding up a wall.
I’ve always thought that writing and acting must have very similar bases: let’s be somebody else for awhile.
I love it that your character is so beloved. I see her mentioned all the time now. Hey, I know a star!
So do I. You.
LOL. NOBODY asks for my photo in restaurants. You win.
I would if we ever were in the same one. The trouble is that your groupies(fan is too weak a word!) live too far from you.
Had a lovely time last week with an old friend – especially enjoyed showing her some favourite places. The garden is beautiful – all the roses are covered in flowers, and three of them have an intense old rose perfume. And the strawberries have started, so I’m enjoying them and garden salads every day.
I’ve been very happy on the cruise. Lots of sleeping in and not having to clean up have her nice. I do keep the cabin tidy for our room
steward but he makes the bed and brings clean towels.
Southwest Alaska is rhododendron heaven. I’ve seen more rhodos here than in Ireland and that’s saying something! I’ll post pictures when I have better wifi.
We have had 3 deaths in the “family” since late May: my friend Tammy, our friend Cory, and my cousin’s husband Doug. It’s made for some sad moments but 2 of the 3 were not unexpected.
I am happy about Lavender and co though!
Office Wench Cherry — I’m glad you are far away from the wildfires right now.
I had a really lovely long weekend. I took Thursday and Friday off as bereavement time for my grandmother’s service and had a lot of family visits. Good food, rampaging through my closet, reveling in my stress-cleaned house, etc. Today the hubby and I went to a rummage sale at the historical society, paired with an art show in the adjacent park and a strawberry festival and tour of the also adjacent church built in the 1800s.
The only problem is that now I have to go back to work and I am rather dreading that.
https://www.instagram.com/p/CtW_VbcOdJD/?igshid=MTc4MmM1YmI2Ng==
That’s a lovely church
yes gorgeous
Isn’t it? Apparently the star map painted in the knave (nave?) is at least somewhat accurate to the day when the church officially opened, which I thought was a nice idea.
Hurray! Today Instagram will show me the picture without insisting that I sign in to my non-existent account, and the church is lovely.
I had Eggs Benedict at IHOP this week and honestly I’m going to make at home it was so good. Two English muffins halved, and topped with sauteed spinach, mushrooms, cherry tomatoes, pesto a poached egg on each and hollandaise sauce. So filling.
We couldn’t find a company to mow the lawn so the husband bought a self propelled lawn mower. I had to move him out the way so I could use it, my first time ever mowing the yard. OK, half the yard. If only it could turn corners on a dime. Maybe someday a robotic mower will be invented.
Thirdly the new about to be published series from Jenny and Bob. No lines no waiting. Yay!
Pretty sure they already sell robotic lawn mowers, basically a roomba with blades. Yep: https://www.amazon.com/Roomba-Lawn-Mower/s?k=Roomba+Lawn+Mower
Not really sure I’d trust it, but then again, I’ve been spoiled by having neighbors who’ve mowed my fairly small (once I let a lot of it go natural) yard for thirty-plus years, close to forty years now.
If a roomba vacuum can escape to the great outdoors who knows where a roomba lawnmower will end up ?
https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-cambridgeshire-60084347
Thanks for bringing back this blast from the past. I enjoyed this article every bit as much as I did last year.
Yippee for my preorder of the Liz Danger series. And releasing them a month apart is perfect. I can luxuriate in reading and rereading before the next one comes out.
Happy that I have started collaging to replace eating between meals. I’m seeing results in the form of a 5 pound loss.
Happy that working with my accountability partner is resulting in more words and sticking with my wip.
Currently I am sitting in a park commuming with a tree. IG link
https://www.instagram.com/p/CtXaFf-vHQm/?igshid=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==
Happiness is my daughter’s first commitment ceremony of two going basically well with only minor glitches and DD being over the moon about it.
I’m still recovering physically (I’ve also been walking more than 8000 steps a day here and one day did 15,000 so that is both a cause for happiness and may help explain my soreness.)
While DD and her partner have chosen eachother as life partners and plan to be parents together they also have chosen a polyamorous life and have a lot of queer friends who came dressed in a wide range of clothes. And the ceremony itself was both very Jewish ( two rabbis and a cantor) and very adapted. The event was also pretty idiosyncratic, with a reasonably formal sit down dinner but no cake (lots of desserts), no rings, no throwing of the bouquet, and no change in legal status. (DD wore a white pantsuit over a camisole made out of a cream pink and gold upcycled Japanese obi.) It was interesting to watch my neighbors and brother in law and partner as they learned a lot about DDs life they didn’t previously know. I expect some interesting convos in the weeks to come. The motto of the weekend we all agreed was F-ck the patriarchy but some of the patriarchs were resisting.
It ended with about 30 guests making s’mores and spending the night in tents.
And now we spend 5 days in Edinburgh for our first vacation as a couple in years that isn’t also a visit to a kid or family member or a work trip. So that’s a happy.
Trump getting indicted is also a happy. So is George Santos probably having to reveal who gave him the money for bail. ( I don’t believe for a moment that it’s family members because it doesn’t seem like anyone in his family has that kind of money.)
Pre ordering the three books will be a happy once I’m back in the US.
It was a vegetarian menu for kosher reasons so I had to bring kosher marshmallows to London. And I figured if I was going to ever wear a fascinator it would be at my daughter’s British wedding so I did . Also a happy
Googled ‘fascinator’. What fun. Do you have a pic of you in your fascinator?
https://instagram.com/stories/debbie.stein.923/3123376012142081227?utm_source=ig_story_item_share&igshid=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==
Love the fascinator. Love the description of the wedding.
Love that. What a great color. Looks good on you.
Thanks !
You look like you are ready to go to the Queen’s garden party.
That sounds like a great ceremony!
Debbie, It all sounds wonderful and fulfilling and overflowing with love.
Happiness is more good books to read.
And it’s finishing the minutes from the election meetings. My part should wrap up tomorrow.
And clear skies are a very big happy.
Happiness is many things. One of them is that since I am no longer addicted to coffee, I have never suffered the pleasure of kopi luwak coffee.
And it gets better.
Coffee pooped from an Indonesian skunk. I am happily avoiding this extremely expensive “luxury.” You know, some coffee addict had to have gone without his cuppa for days when he said to himself, “Maybe if I was the rest of the sh*t off these beans…”
Maybe if I wash the rest of
Yeah, some things really make me wonder about the minds of the first people who ate them. That’s one.
This was my birthday week, so I had an actual day of my birth, with lunch, a massage, and Raiders of the Lost Ark on the big screen.
Then yesterday I threw my usual bonfire, bring food and chairs and sit by the ocean party. It was its usual wonderful self, although I missed some friends. While everything happens outside, and people do bring wonderful food and drink, it’s still a lot of work to move things out to the edge of the yard by the stone fire pit. I think next year I’ll ask for some help.
Today we went to a Portland Seadogs game, ate a hotdog and drank some beer. Now I’m happy, tired, and going to beg. Hopefully older and wiser. Certainly older!
Looking forward to reading some new Crusie/Mayer books!
To bed. I went to bed.
The thing that made me happiest this week is my latest landscape painting. It’s of forested hills above a swamp and I wasn’t much liking it. It looked flat and boring. Then I upped the contrast in the hills and started adding toitoi to the swamp, and it made such a difference. Now, every time I look at it, it makes me happy.
Other happies were having friends over, a little bit of improvement in my health, a general sense of satisfaction from tidying up my home, and relief at finding an electrician who can replace my switchboard soon. Progress is being made on multiple fronts!
Will the Liz Danger-books be in audio, too…? (Pleasesayyespleasesayyespleasesayyes!) All Jenny’s books should be available in audio.
My cautious happy is having a good psychiatrist that tries to get it and find a solution. He called Friday as promised, and had apparently read notes from the head-psychologist about what’s going on for he sounded deeply concerned and sad about the negative turn of the tides. He said he’d think it over, but didn’t wanna leave me hanging over the weekend so he prescribed sleeping pills so I’d at least get some rest and hopefully that’d help a little, and then he’d call Monday to check how it went. So he did, and MIL rushed to pick them up from the pharmacy before they closed (My MIL is the very best).
They help me sleep. I don’t even hear the cats screaming at the bedroom door anymore*, which is a huge relief. I sleep all through the night without waking up – Haven’t slept like that for many, many years. And, I don’t feel like a zombie during the day, which I had expected. The enhanced sleep also lowers the anxiety-levels and things somewhat – as we all know, being tired cranks those levels up to nutsy. Good start.
Right now I find it very hard to talk about how I feel if people can hear me, so I mailed him a summary (a bit like the one I gave you here) before our chat today. He called and said he’s got a clearer picture now, BUT wants to have a more thorough talk about it and scheduled me for an appointment on the 30th. He says meds might help some of course, but right now he feels that the problem is me not having any goals, no hopes or dreams for the future to work towards, no tangible reason to get up in the morning and no control over whom I feel I can trust and/or lean on when it’s storming. It makes me very sad (trying not to cry as I type this), because he’s probably right but they put me in therapy for this before and ended it with something like: “Well, you just gotta figure it out then, what you want. ‘Feel better’ or ‘be happy’ isn’t tangible enough”. It was at that time I started doing the mosaics for real but it did not work out the way we’d hoped. It’s fun but it leads nowhere, which sort of ruins the fun.
So… It’s kind of a happy but also a lot of sad. I don’t know if I can do therapy AGAIN. Maybe I AM just broken after all. I DON’T WANNA BE LIKE THIS!
* Does anybody have any tips on how to make the cats stop trying to scratch themselves through the bedroom door during the night? And scream. We used to have the door open and it was fine, but we let them go outside now since 1.5 months (only in the backyard) and that door is in our bedroom, so they’ll either stand screaming there or try to ruin our whatsthenameinEnglish sort of foldable mosquito net door to get our attention (they NEVER touch it during the day, only nighttime if we don’t let them out). So we’ve had to close the bedroom door during the nights. It’s exhausting to have them scratching and meowing on the other side, and so far we’ve just tried to ignore them until the morning and hope they’ll get the message eventually, but it’s…tiring. Tips, anyone? Either on how to keep them from the bedroom door or from the backyard door so we can have the bedroom door open. I don’t mind having them in the bedroom at all, but I mind when they ruin things or keep us awake. Thanks in advance.
Can you install a cat door in the door to outside ?
I don’t know your cats, Shass, but our cat is very demanding about getting through closed doors that keep him from desired things. We have a cat flap/ cat door in the bottom of the laundry room/garage door, which he uses when the house doors are locked. And we keep our bedroom door open at night, since when the mood strikes him, he wants to sleep curled up next to one of us.
As far as food items go, we have had to start leaving out a plate of “overnight crunchies” so that when he returns to the house and feels hunger pangs while we sleep, he knows where to go to find some food.
And as far as the screaming goes, maybe a white noise machine or a radio or television left on at low sound levels would interfere with his sound or possibly would soothe your cats enough to give you some peace at night. Good luck!!!
I doubt a white noise machine would drown out the caterwauling.
The fact that therapy didn’t work before doesn’t mean it won’t this time because . . . different therapist. I’ve had twelve and I’m about to move on to thirteen because I moving to another state and my current therapist, whom I love dearly, isn’t licensed in PA. Some of the therapists I’ve had in the past: the one in college when I was eighteen who kept hugging me; he was male and those hugs lasted a long time so I only went twice. The therapist who really liked me and wanted to fix me up with her brother. The therapist who took me to a faith healer (I didn’t know w=that was what he was) who passed a peach pit over me and told me I had pancreatic cancer (I had colon cancer which we all already knew, that’s why I was in therapy). But I had some great ones in there, too, so you have to keep trying.
Audio: We may, but we have to see how this goes; the audio is really expensive, especially since we’d pay two people, and we’re in the middle of getting Lavender out and finishing Rocky Start and moving to different states, so it depends. But I know how necessary it is, Shass, and Bob wants to do it, so hang in there until we get settled again, please.
Oh, and good job on the sleeping pills. Lack of sleep is a HUGE factor in depression, so that’s a big step.
Wait. You’ve killed 12 therapists?
I need to re-evaluate.
I think if she had killed 12 therapists, it would be too late to re-evaluate. 😀
I don’t know why he’s re-evalutating anyway. It’s not like I’ve killed any of my collaborators.
They all lived.
That’s a very violent world inside your head there, Mayer.
Well, the one who kept hugging you potentially needed killing. And the one who tried to set you up with her brother needed at least a bitch slap. I volunteer.
All long ago. Current therapist is a dream. I told her today if she really loved me she’d get licensed in PA. She said, “Nice guilt.”
Sleep is so important! I’m glad you are finally getting to sleep all night. It will really help everything! Cats don’t like citrus. Maybe put some outside the door? Those videos of cats jumping away from a cucumber also come to mind.
I’m also wondering whether anyone has given you a vocational assessment or whether you have ever read “what color is your parachute”. One of those might give you some ideas. Maybe you need a career counselor as well as a therapist
I love What Color is Your Parachute. I read it thirty years ago and did the exercises and was just blown away by the assumptions I’d made about my life.
Then I quit my very solid job and became a freelance writer. It’s a good book.
I assume the cats want to go out at night and you don’t want them to? I can’t think of any way to stop them from wanting out. So … This’ll probably sound awful, but can you shut the cats in another part of the house overnight? Even if it’s the bathroom. If there’s 2 doors between them and you, they may not keep you awake.
That’s a good idea. They will be indignant, but quite safe and you can sleep.
Your shrink sounds like a miracle in today’s health care. Considering how much better he is starting off, I think that therapy with this guy might be a much different experience if he is willing to help you find the focus he says you require. If he thinks that making that pronouncement is the end of his job, then he is a pill happy idiot,but I am encouraged by the fact that he is presenting drugs as an introductory tool, rather than a quick fix.
I am praying that this is the beginning of a less frustrating period for you. I know that it is nearly impossible to be hopeful when you feel this depressed so I am sending you some of mine. And all the love, support and encouragement that can travel by email.
Having done several intensive stints of therapy during my adult life, having the right therapist for you is key. You need to feel comfortable with them. The fact that previous therapy ended putting the responsibility on you suggests to me that the therapist/process wasn’t a good fit for you. I also firmly believe that medication is a personal choice. It’s worked very well for me for many years. Good for you taking sleeping pills.
Hi Shass, I don’t have anything to add to the already offered cat management strategies. All I could think was the sound must be shattering & so punishing when you can’t sleep & are struggling just to ‘be’ each day. It is great that your psych is willing to listen/read where you are at. But I can totally understand the feeling of not wanting to try more therapy given previous outcomes. What helped me a lot (& still does when needed) is when the depression was telling me whatever nasty negative track it had decided to slam my head & body with at the time; if I could bring myself to remember that depression is a demon liar and these were just words/thoughts/sensations that I didn’t have to accept as truth. And that I was not hopeless/broken/useless or beyond help & this was just now & not forever. That has taken time & work & a couple of different therapists but it was definitely worth it. I hope you can soon find the best way to help you move forward to find the most positive way way of living your life. Apologies if this is TMI. I just thought I would mention it because it did help me when people were willing to share something that resonated & made me feel less like I was the only one struggling so hard. Take care of you.
That bit about demon liar is so true. The things that would stew in my mind were so awful, I was stupid, I was a bad writer and that’s why I couldn’t finish a book, nobody liked me because I was boring, I was a terrible mother (that one might have some basis), I’d just drown in them. Depression is a bitch.
I have two things that worked for me.
1) My bedroom door opens onto a little hallway with the stairs leading down to the living room, and the bathroom door off the same hallway. I put in a child-safety gate at the top of the stairs, which was enough for my previous cat. When my current cat jumped over that I made it taller by attaching a sheet of plexiglass I had lying around.
If I need to shut the cat out of the bedroom, he keeps scratching and calling at the door, waking me. But if I put him in the downstairs living room and kitchen area, where he has food and drinking water and a litterbox, and close the child gate at the top of the stairs as well as my bedroom doors, he’ll stand at the top of the stairs and call for a bit, then grow resigned and go sleep downstairs.
I do have to answer him a few times first, after the door is closed, so he knows I’m still there and he isn’t all alone in the house – I just say something like “I’m here, go to sleep, it’s bedtime” a few times and then stop answering (or he’d go on forever).
Because he’s not right at the bedroom door, the noise isn’t loud enough that he keeps me awake.
If your home is all on the same level, but you can close an extra door between your bedroom door and the cat’s nighttime space, the two doors together might work for you too.
2) My current cat batters at the cat flap in the back door when I close it to keep him inside at night, he’s broken three of them already.
I finally bought a heavy wooden room-divider screen that I put in front of the garden door at night. That way it’s clear to him that the door he uses is not there, he can’t go through this wooden panel, and he doesn’t try.
Something like this might save your mosquito-screen door (link to a foldable screen from VidaXL.nl, where I bought mine during the pandemic, at the bottom; Xenos shops in the Netherlands also sell such things).
It has 4 panels, 3 of which stretch across and fill the garden door opening, while the fourth sticks out into the room at an angle so the whole thing stays balanced during the night – you’ld have to consider if this would be in the way of your nighttime walking-routes, from the bed to the bathroom; in that case it’s not a good idea. In the daytime I fold it up against the wall beside the door.
Link :
https://www.vidaxl.nl/e/vidaxl-kamerscherm-met-4-panelen-140×165-cm-hout-cremekleurig/8720286655047.html
I’m often late reading posts and never know if i should comment late or wait… Anyway, happy I managed to track down the Liz Danger books for pre order ! I had missed the posts about them.
Also excited about a pre order landing on my kindle as I have never done that before.
Other happy is continued good weather, lots of lake swimming and actually doing a few jobs on my very long list.
I harvested 5 ripe Red Fire Peppers from my gardens (Theresa and Harvey Too) which, when minced and added to diced red onions and minced garlic, formed the seasoning base for a pot of My Chili. All I needed to add was extra lean ground beef, tomato sauce, and RoTel diced tomatoes and chilis. I also harvested some green onions.
The first bowl of chili was with jalapeño rice. The second with macaroni and cheddar cheese. The final bowl was with water crackers. Today was a good day to diet. I worfed them bowls down. 😉
I’m a happy pre-orderer. And I got to tell someone else about the pre-orders, so I will give and receive 🙂