This is a Working Wednesday on Friday Because I Was Overwhelmed and Forgot What Day It Was, Sorry About That March 24, 2023March 23, 2023 ~ Jenny This week I revised a novel, plotted a sex scene for another novel, filled a dumpster, bathed a dog, and forgot it was Wednesday. Really sorry about that. What did you work on this week?
85 thoughts on “This is a Working Wednesday on Friday Because I Was Overwhelmed and Forgot What Day It Was, Sorry About That”
I’m first! (Yes, that IS my big accomplishment for this week.)
Also working on cleaning my house and writing. And trying to stay sane.
I actually ended up accomplishing things today, Jenny, so maybe it was meant to be Working Friday all along?
I went to the Spectrum office to try and upgrade my phone. That was a bust, because they’re shutting it down in a week and they didn’t have the phone I wanted in stock. But the guy there did give me some good suggestions.
Then I went to the grocery store to pick up the few things I needed for tomorrow’s belated Spring Equinox ritual and feast with my gang, and the liquor store next door to it to take advantage of their 20% off sale on cases of wine.
To top things off, I actually took the car to a car wash on the way home, to rinse off all the road salt. Then came home, unpacked everything, and ordered the phone I wanted from Spectrum online.
I really want to fall over now, but I need to do some writing first. Then a nap, followed by a Zoom tarot reading for someone at 3. Definitely working today!
I am working on saying “no” and not feeling guilty about it later. Most of the making art books mention it and I understand it logically, but emotionally is a different thing.
This week I said no to a birthday party for my cousin’s three year old. He announced it on short notice, never had a party before, and it is almost an hour away. Also, I don’t like this cousin. And I had already mailed the little one his gift. I feel bad for the little one, as I don’t think this party will be well attended, but he really doesn’t know me or care. I had decided previously that I would be the person who would show up for family events. Now I am going to try to be the person who goes to the events that I want to go to. And not feel guilty about it.
That is a hard one to master. Not that I’m claiming to have done it, but I do find usually that in fact it turns out to be best for all concerned, even though I can never foresee that. Trust your instincts!
I am very good at guilt-free no’s. I tell people that way they will know when I say yes it is a genuine, enthusiastic yes.
I aspire to this. Pedro Pascale, not a care in the world, style.
I learned the hard way in my salad days by lending various family members money and never seeing a penny of it back. Now I can shout ‘no’ from the rooftops about anything – money, time, sympathy, you name it.
Lupe, your decision seems perfectly reasonable. What you do with your time is not anyone else’s business, and you do not have to explain. As you said, you had already sent a gift and done your part. You have a right to do what you feel is best for you.
Thank you. Logically, I know, but I still feel like the bad guy. Catholic guilt takes a lifetime to unlearn.
Catholic guilt is forever! Doesn’t matter who you grow up to be, it’s ingrained. Doesn’t mean you have to listen to the little monster, though. Good luck! <3
Anglican guilt here – even though I left the church fifty years ago.
The not explaining is key. “I’m sorry, I can’t make it.” is more than enough, and doesn’t leave room for them to talk you out of your no, or judge your reason.
This! I learned this from Miss Manners who said to say “I’m so sorry I simply can’t. Do let me call you when I see my way clear.”
If it makes you feel better, it’s unlikely the three-year-old will know or care that his/her party wasn’t well-attended. He will know that you sent him something. And maybe the cousin will plan ahead a little better in future.
(I come from a family of 7 and married a man with 5 kids. Learning to set an occasional boundary has been a necessity. For example, my stepdaughter, whom I like very much, wants me to host a family gathering for Easter but we just moved two weeks ago and I’m exhausted. So, regretfully, I’m going to say ‘no.’)
I’m building a cabinet that looks a little off kilter so I took it apart and will start over. Pretty sure it’s not supposed to be an origami piece of art.
Oh… and watched lots of basketball because… March Madness!
I made my non-carpentry resume so I can apply to some part time jobs here while I figure out my next move. I applied to a job at a library branch but was rejected. I didn’t take it too hard, but I’m still feeling anxiety in general because I don’t have much practice applying to jobs and also because change makes me anxious haha
Does your library have a volunteer program? Sometimes that is a way to get your foot in the door and pick up some skills that look nice on a resume. We had volunteers come in once a week for a couple of hours.
Ooh that’s a great idea! I’ll look into that — thanks!
I repaired & strengthened my greenhouse, with a lot of help from Mel at the allotments. Need to check on it – it’s very windy – but yesterday we agreed it’s looking good, as long as the Gorilla tape holds. So I’ve finally populated it with chrysanths and peas in pots, and sown salad stuff and carrots. Fingers crossed.
Also finished editing the recipes I’ve collected over the years, and printed them – so no excuse for not trying some new ones, especially more vegetarian stuff. I’d like to expand my repertoire of favourites a little.
I’m trying to raise my spirits. Discovered finally that there doesn’t seem to be any physical problem causing my light-headedness/low energy, although the doctor suggested I continue taking a reduced dose of vitamin B12, since it seems to help a bit. So I think I’m just stressed at facing old age alone, and feeling I haven’t accomplished much. I’m looking for things that might help, and talking it over with friends. I’m sure the change of season will be good, as well.
Next week, as part of my new strategy, I want to start sorting the mountain of unedited photographs (13-14,000) on my Mac, since they’re in the way of me doing anything with my photography, and that’s been getting me down for a good while.
Oh, and I complained to my library about their reservation fees. Alas, they’re about to go up yet again, to £1.10 per book. I told the librarian how much better the library systems in the US, Canada and Ireland were, and she promised to pass on my remarks. Of course, as I said to her, what will actually happen is that fewer and fewer people will request books, and the council will say there’s no demand, and shrink the library service yet further – as they’ve been doing ever since 2010.
What! They charge to reserve a book? Yikes! Is that what a “subscription library” is (like I’ve read in historical novels)?
Hopefully the strengthening sunshine will help your blues. I know it makes a huge difference to me, energywise.
And I also find that accomplishing a task I have put off for a long time will boost my energy, too. Having it hover is usually worse than actually doing it.
Best of luck! I enjoying seeing your photos on Instagram. 🙂
Thanks, Brenda. And no: you have to pay a regular subscription to a subscription library; this is just a fee for each book you want to request.
That fee just makes my former inter-library loan librarian heart hurt.
Do you have a Friends of the Library group? At my library we hold book sales a few times a year to bolster funds at the local branch. This might also demonstrate community support for the library and help refute the council members who say there is no demand. It will also help those who are being shut out by the short sighted policies of the council.
That is a thought. We don’t have a group like that: there’s a legal obligation on the local authority to provide public libraries, so they’re one of many services that have been starved of funds for political reasons. I think I’d be reluctant to go down your route because it’s a step towards privatization and unequal provision: most people here who care about libraries want their funding restored.
In the US the friends of the library groups lobby for library funding. It’s not either or .
I’m so sorry that it’s not a readily curable thing. Weird question, how are your calcium levels ? I’m having similar symptoms and they think it’s my parathyroids which will ultimately require surgery but for now require less calcium in my diet.
The doctor re-checked this morning that my thyroid levels were normal, so I doubt I have your problem – but thanks for the suggestion.
How’s your vitamin D levels? I’m prone to SAD during the winter months
I’ve been taking vitamin D as a precaution for the past two or three months, so hopefully OK. But also very much looking forward to more sun.
Apparently parathyroids are not part of the thyroid—they are just next to it. A parathyroid problem is indicated when your calcium levels are high not when your thyroid levels are off…
Obv I’m just sharing because it’s happened to me and I have no medical qualification so do ignore me if I’m annoying .
No: thanks for the info.
To (mis)quote Tolkein, It’s no bad thing to celebrate a simple life.
But my husband has similar thoughts. We aren’t going to have children, and it feels like we are going to leave this world with out much of a trace. I comfort myself by thinking that my art is my legacy and try to give away as much of it as I can. There was a local artist who did amazingly delicate calligraphy and illuminated manuscript and she gave them away. I have found three at estate sales and bought them. Her work was cherished and lives on.
Is there something that you can do that will give you the same feeling?
I’m sort of thinking on those lines, though not with much confidence. But I really do need to sort out my photography before it’s practical to do anything much with it.
I’ve been planting native plants since retirement to help save the habitat , ecosystem, earth. Also promoting the same in local gardening group and volunteer work. I like to make a ripple that spreads.
Have you had Covid at any point? Because long Covid can manifest in all sorts of strange ways, although low energy long term is certainly one of them.
I haven’t had Covid, so far as I know – since I was part of a Covid study, it’d have had to be 100% symptomless for me to have missed it. Alas, I think it’s age + stress.
OK. I’ll pile on. I use Flower Essences, (Like Bach) and they have really helped me. There are several companies in the U.S. that make their own mixes, which are wonderful.
That’s a thought: I do have some, though haven’t used them for a while. Thanks.
I have a bunch of the Bach remedies, but don’t use them regularly. Which ones are you finding helpful, Jan?
I was just reading a short piece on treating fatigue (in the context of Parkinson’s, but applicable in general), and how the big challenge is in figuring out what’s “normal” fatigue (due to poor sleep, stress, overexertion, etc.) and what is actually a symptom of something. There’s just no objective tool for it, not even something as barely effective as the widely used pain scales (and anyone who’s had to use the pain scales knows how meaningless they are). And fatigue is a symptom of just about EVERYthing, so it can’t be used to rule anything in or out.
Fatigue is so hard to quantify even if it’s your own fatigue that you have fifty-plus years of experience with. The online Covid symptom long-term study I’m in only offers two levels of fatigue: “mild” and “severe–can hardly get out of bed.” For headache pain they at least offer three options: “occasional”, “frequent”, and “all-day.”
Jane, have you ever thought of proposing a gardening book (or a cooking book) to one of your clients? You’ve a fund of knowledge, you write well, you’re organized and you know the industry. And you could supply some of the photos…
I’d buy it!
Thanks, both – but I have done that, with a couple of non-fiction projects, and got nowhere. I know, from the other side of the fence, that unless you already have a big audience – by being on TV, for example – you’re not going to be published, at least in illustrated books. The origination costs are too high – they require a large print run to make sense.
I do plan to play around with self-publishing small projects as ebooks – if there’s now reliable software to make that viable.
Don’t apologize, Jenny. We just love hearing from you, whenever it works out.
I finished my taxes! They are ready to mail at a later date, and the files of receipts and bills are in a box that is labelled and put away. BIG accomplishment, every year.
I dug out a tall metal post that was becoming embedded in my Red Osier Dogwood. It isn’t needed anymore to keep the tree upright.
I will see my new dentist this morning. She is closer to me, and takes my Medicare Advantage Insurance.
I unpacked yet more boxes. I never did find my hairbrushes, but I did find the rest of my pants, so that was a win.
You won’t find your hairbrushes until you have bought new ones, that is how it works, then they will turn up in a box, you know you already checked
I’m working on the lead up to a new book release on April 13. I always forget how many bits and pieces there are to attend to.
Also, just about done crocheting a French market bag. It looks close enough to the photo on the pattern to be happy with it!
I’m working on census comments, our taxes, my daughter’s taxes, three grant reports, my daughters two commitment ceremonies, and figuring out how to stop my mom if she tries driving without a license. I think it’s gotta be about money… anyway, I am definitely working.
I will say I am learning all kinds of interesting strategies people have used to stop their parents driving . Sadly none will work for my mom but it seems to be a widespread challenge.
My father did not argue when his doctor told him to stop driving, but he asked me over and over why the doctor had done so (usually when I was driving him places) and I would silently consider his cataracts, and his dementia, and his really bad arthritis, and say truthfully I didn’t know, that he hadn’t discussed it with me. Then one day my father had some trouble getting his leg all the way into the car, and when he asked me why Dr. A had made him stop driving, I said again that I didn’t know, but I asked him to think about how much trouble he had just had with his right leg, and asked whether he was sure, absolutely sure, that in an emergency he could react quickly. He said nothing, but he never brought up the subject again over the last seven years of his life. (My father was such a dear, and not at all stubborn. Unlike my mother, and me, and your mother.)
That is tear-inducing, especially since I adore my dad. My dad is a emeritus physics professor, Wodehouse and Rumpole-loving reader and a kind and optimistic guy. At 83, he still drives well and enjoys so much about life. The thought of losing his presence in my life is daunting.
My father lived to be 96, and I am grateful for every day I had with him. (And my mother, who only made it to 82.) He was still driving safely long after 83. When he was 81 he fell fourteen feet out of a tree he was trimming without breaking or spraining anything.
Don’t know how to stop determined people driving unless, you get a class of school children learning road safety to shame her. That worked for a load of people who got caught speeding
We got the police to suspend her license after she drove into her house leaving a 9 inch hole
TWO commitment ceremonies?
Yeah. They live in London so one there with his family and their friends and one here in the US for our family and her college and childhood friends
My great-uncle had been a truck driver virtually all of his life and when he retired he started a trucking company. He was 90 when he last renewed his class 1 to be able to drive rigs. Now, to be fair to him, he knew enough not to drive them on the highway or with loads but he would ferry them around town to the mechanics or where ever they needed to go. He very much was the exception to the scary older driver rule.
There are exceptions. My mom has a dropped foot, lost half the vision in her good eye, has been observed to drive dangerously, and is generally frail and probably distracted by pain —even before she drove the car into the house.
Her next door neighbor who is the same age is quite sturdy and as far as I know doesn’t have any medical problems.
The issue is not her age it’s her condition.
We’re going to be (almost) book-release siblings! I’ve got one coming out on April 11 (although it’s a re-release of a novella that was part of an anthology before). Not as much work for a re-release though.
My big to do this week was taking off the slip cover to the love seat/hideaway bed washing it and putting it back on while it was still wet. It’s better to put the cushion covers on wet so they will align and I can put them out in the sunshine to dry. I remember doing this by myself in my younger days now it takes the two of us that’s four hands cramming cushions and zipping them up into covers. Barring any spills this will be the last time. After thirteen years we have never used the bed.
Helping my husband deal with being hospitalized for pneumonia AGAIN and working hard to make sure they didn’t mess him up worse by treating the textbook instead of the patient. Now we’re working on getting him discharged, which from experience will take all day. The U.S. medical establishment is NOT designed for the welfare of the patient. Unfortunately, as far as I can tell from my international friends’ experiences, no medical system is. 🙁
I accomplished things last weekend but really nothing since. Day Job has been wonky this week due to network problems (theirs) and remote-work problems (also theirs). I can live with the status quo but it sure would be nice if maybe, someday, IT departments figured out how to exactly duplicate someone’s profile to a new workstation. Maybe take a lot of screenshots and save them to an archive that doesn’t live on the previous workstation’s hard drive? IDK
I have a week left of March to accomplish my goal of being unpacked in the Owner’s Suite. Today’s task is to move my refrigerator from the far end of the basement to the end containing my Suite (done) while keeping it plugged in to its outlet via a 50′ extension cord (done) and then tacking said extension cord to the joists in the ceiling of the basement, up off the floor and out of the way (not even started.)
The face of the fridge should be flush with the bookcases that form a wall of my Suite, but that requires me to unload and move a bookcase. I confess I am procrastinating. All my tuits are square – I need to get a round tuit.
I unloaded that cubical storage unit, moved it, and put the fridge where I wanted it. Then I put the cubical storage unit in its new spot and re-packed it. That’s when I ran out of tuits. The extension cord is still on the floor. Now I want a different configuration. It’s always something.
This past weekend was our quilt show. We had record attendance. Just wow!
I entered 10 quilts. I got two ribbons – a second place, and an honorable mention. It’s great to see them all hanging up.
I’m having issues pasting in the instagram link on my phone, but if you search ArghInk you’ll see them. Look for the llama quilt again.
Other than that, I’ve been going through old photos, looking to add to the Dad slideshow we have set up for his celebration of life tomorrow.
That is a LOT to be working on all at once, no wonder you missed Wednesday
This week’s focus; finals for one kid, a health crisis, and house cleaning because as finals kid said “nothing says I love you like a clean toilet to throw up in”.
You gotta love a kid who keeps their sense of humor even when sick
Yesterday I planted the three free tree seedlings (internal rhyme!) from the Conservation District yearly giveaway. They seldom give away trees I want on a day when I’m not working, but this time it lined up, and now I have a baby redbud and a dogwood, and a tulip poplar which I didn’t exactly need (many shade trees already) but managed to find room for. Today the weather is watering them in for me, and I hope not drowning their very healthy root systems. Now I have to break it to my yard man that I have planted yet more trees for him to dodge.
Redbud and dogwood! They were so gorgeous the time I visited Pennsylvania in April. Like lace frills along the edge of every wood. Unfortunately, your kind of dogwood doesn’t do well in our climate.
No one wants to know what I’ve been doing today. It involves the tail end of dogs.
Other than that, yesterday Paul finally got me to confess that I’ve been feeling a bit down and disappointed because I was hoping to go to the Alberta Orchid Society show next weekend and didn’t think it was going to happen. It was kind of the tipping point for me thinking that I wouldn’t be able to do as much in the garden this year as I wanted because of anxiety reasons. Then it just was the whole anxiety/depression spin cycle – around and around and around again. He told me he wanted me to go and I could leave the dogs at home so I could have the whole day to myself. That, and the great big hug when I was stressed and anxious about getting supper on, made me feel a lot better.
Taxes are done and refunds will be deposited next week.
This afternoon is going to be more housework and cleaning and ice removal on the front sidewalk.
I’m slogging through the proofreading of a manuscript (which involves simultaneously cutting almost 3K words, so it’s a bit more intense than just finding typos, but at least I’m on the last 10 pages and under 100 words of cuts needed). I’m also working really hard at NOT thinking about my new proposal being out on submission and NOT bugging my agent to find out if she’s heard anything yet after a whole four days on sub. (My agent is a saint, but still …)
I’ve also been yelling at people online. Nicely, and for good reasons, like the health care provider who insisted, shrug, so what if we pump people (who have my rare disorder) with extra phosphate they don’t need; “that can’t harm anyone” — when that will actually cause our phosphate levels to DROP further and potentially damage our kidneys and parathyroids, not that those are necessary organs or anything– and another health care person who pretty much erased the existence of all adults with rare disorders, as if we don’t need treatment too Sigh. Oh, and then there was the speaker about the importance of patient engagement who, when I reached out to her, ignored me.
On the plus side, the same social media that brought those negative things to my attention also brought someone (a patient with my rare disorder) to my attention, who needed information, and I was able to provide links to several journal articles that they seemed grateful for, so my advocacy work didn’t entirely feel like a waste of time.
Friday is writing day. Two hours writing and reading our work. It was heaven. This week working through the to be done list including quite a long phone call with the cruise company getting a gift card retrieved for new cruise. No, I did I use my portion and take a three day cruise with a man who is not my husband in December! Nor would I travel across the continent for only three days. In the end it was sorted after much exasperation. Garden is next. Will try sowing seeds this year.
🤦🏻♀️ No, I did NOT use my portion…. But you all know that. Still exasperated. I kept asking is the said Carol …and man from Canada, do they live at…are they xx years old…I’m pretty sure people have someone somewhere in the world with the same name! Funniest thing was they called back and told me to forget everything I was told. O-kay then.
Wow! Jennie you have really been busy.
I haven’t; just doing only what I have to do.
My one new project is to check the phones on my landlines. I have a lot of static and a wonky internet connection. The result of the company’s remote testing of the line was ‘indeterminate’. Rather than send someone out which may or may not cost me a service fee, the tech suggested I unplug everything and bring the phones on one at a time and see if my (very old) equipment is the problem. So I really have to get around to doing that. Tomorrow.
I spent four hours at the Emergency Room last Friday, after Dr Apple Watch told me I have Afib and suggested I call my doctor. Huh. Called my son (RN in Hawaii) instead, whined Do I hafta? He pointed out I have symptoms, and told me to get my butt to the ER. Older son drove me. Dr agreed with Apple Watch, told me Afib is common in old people (I thanked him; I’m only 70!). And started me on a beta-blocker and blood thinners. So I am now wandering around foggy due to the beta blocker. Hard to think. Taking afternoon naps again.
In other news, my son is proceeding with all his hoops to onboard with the Department of Defense job. He has cleared HR; now he has to line up a LOT of references, plus fill out Security’s 10-page questionnaire. He was finger-printed today. The US Government does Not fool around.
Hmm. Think I’ll work on sending things. Today is the second time this month I wrote a comment that isn’t here. This time I actually remember leaving the page to look something urgent up, and thinking “gotta remember to finish and send that”.
I’d like to stop finding unsent drafts of emails or texts too.
Does this look familiar?
I miss that comic so much.
Just came across this feature on a stained glass artist I knew when I lived in Shrewsbury twenty years ago. Thought it might interest some of you. https://www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/gallery/2023/mar/24/shining-a-light-on-a-stained-glass-artist-in-pictures?CMP=Share_iOSApp_Other
That was so interesting; I had not realized how complex that kind of art work could be.
What a lovely piece—really her voice talking about how she does her art, not about her.
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