I’ve just realized I don’t have any sausage in the house. This isn’t that surprising, I’m not a sausage-loving person, but it’s NEW YEAR’S EVE. If I don’t have sausage and sauerkraut tomorrow, I’ll have a horrible year. I had sausage and sauerkraut last year; imagine how much worse this year would have been if I hadn’t.

You don’t eat sausage and sauerkraut on New Year’s Day? You must not be German. I’ve had sausage and sauerkraut on New Years for decades. No idea why, except that the sky will fall if I don’t. So I looked it up. It’s pork, not sausage (I could have been having bacon or pork chops all these years?) because pigs root forward, and the sauerkraut is actually cabbage (bok choy!) which stands for money. Or something.

So now I’m trying to figure out if I want to go out and get pork and sauerkraut or just stay home and count my blessings. It’s a stupid superstition, but . . . what I don’t do it? AAAAAAAAAArgh.

You got any do-this-or-the-new-year-will-be-a-disaster traditions? Tell me I’m not the only one. And if any of you have an eat-chocolate-or-the-sky-will-fall tradition, I’m adopting your heritage.