Demon Name Help

No, not names for demons, I have books for that.

I need the kind of cheesy names that businesses use to cash in on an idea. Names for motels and bars and restaurants, names for food and dress styles, names for amusement park games and rides and for shops and . . . well, you get the pictures. Anything that might be found on a tourist-trap island based on the idea that it’s a gate to Hell.

So far I have:

The Morning Star Newspaper (Dame B)

The Devil’s Playground (the big amusement park on the island)
Main road of the park: Good Intentions Drive (thank you, Anne)
Incu Bus (bus line in the amusement park) (thank you,Fi Mac)

Hell Fries
Fish Styx with Tartarus Sauce
Persephone’s Pomegranate Pops (juice bars, thank you, Kim)

Park Shops
Hell’s Handbaskets (souvenir store, thank you, Nicole)
Hell Freezes Over Ice Cream (thank you, Nicole)

Park Entertainment:
Matt Demon, comedian

Highway to Hell (Roller Coaster that goes underground, thank you, Philby)
The Leviathon (huge roller coaster, thank you, thank you,Michael)
Seven Deadlies; Park Rides (thank you,Nicole Massey)
Night Mares (park ride) (thank you,Fi Mac)
Pair O’ Dice Gambling in the Park (thank you,Nicole)
The Hell-icopter (thank you, Katrina Snow)

Bars, Clubs, Restaurants:
Hell Bar
The Underworld (Bar in a basement)
Satannica (club)
Hell’s Belles (gentlemen’s club/strip club)
Shady Hades (club)
Enki Panki (singles club)
BeelzePub (bar)

Beelzeburgers (thank you,Michael Mock) including the Seven Deadly Burgers (thank you,Nicole)
The Long Spoon (restaurant, thank you, Philby)
The Golden Calf Steakhouse (thank you,Michael Mock)
The Third Circle All You Can Eat Buffet (thank you,Michael Mock)
Fresh Hell Deli (thank you,Micki)
Snowball’s Chance (ice cream parlor, thank you, KJ)
Sweet Temptations (candy store, thank you, Nicole)
Grace Restaurant; beneath it a bar called Fall from Grace (thank you, Georgia)

Dia-Bowl-Us (bowling alley, club)
The Orpheus Theater with the Eurydice Restaurant in the back

The Devil Wears Praxis (Tailor)
Demonista (Women’s Clothing)
Erishka Gals (Women’s Clothing)
DemoGorgeous (Women’s Clothing)
Lara-Lyssa (women’s clothing designer)
Chamber of Scissors (women’s tailor)
Luci Fur (coats and fake fur)
Imp (Children’s Clothing) (thank you,Michael Mock)
Idle Hands (Craft Store)
Hell on Wheels Bike Shop (thank you, Camilla)
Hell Bent for Leather (Leather goods) (thank you,Dame B)
Shades (Curtains and Upholstery) (thank you,Micki)
Paper Dispensations Stationary (thank you,Michael Mock)

Charon’s Taxi Service
Yama Glamour (beauty salon)
Asphodel Meadows (retirement home)
Cerberus Vet and Kennels
BeelzeSuds: (Laundromat, thank you, Nicole)
Good Intentions Paving Contractors (thank you,Nicole)
Save Your Sole Cobbler (thank you,Fi Mac)
Tia-Mat (Laundromat) (thank you,Michael Mock)
The Primrose Path (Nursery) (thank you,Jane Birdsell)
Vanity Fair Beauty Salon (thank you,Fi Mac)
Devil May Hair Salon (thank you, Salpy)
Hell to Pay Payday Loans (thank you, Dame B)
Rosemary’s Baby-Sitting Service (thank you, AJ)
Hell or High Water Plumbing (thank you, Salpy)
Devil’s Food Cakery (thank you, Salpy)

Motels and Hotels:
The Deville
The Elysian
Inn Fernal
Motel Styx (thank you,Lorna)

Island Social Groups and Churches
Demon Island Historical Society
Church of Satan
The PentaGran, acapella group of five grandmothers (thank you,Fi Mac)

Name the town council refused to approve: Brother’s Keeper (Gardening Supplies) (thank you, Michael Mockm yes, you are going to hell)

Knock yourselves out.

149 thoughts on “Demon Name Help

  1. Descent into Hell (ride)

    Highway to Hell (either ride or main street)

    Long Spoon (restaurant)

    Spawn’s delight (childcare centre)

  2. For a combination bar and laundro-mat: Beelzel-Suds. Italian restaurant: Plutocraci’s. A cluster of themed clubs/bars called The 7 Deadlies. Hell Freezes Over’s competitor, a marble stone type place called Brim’s Stone’s. A pet salon/kennel called Lucy’s Fur Emporeum. A thrift store called Faustian Bargains. A sewing/knitting shop: Untangled Webs. Fallen Angel’s Chicken Wings shop. A candy shop called Sweet Temptations. Good Intentions Paving Contractors. Shipping/mailbox store: Hell’s Handbaskets. Now for some burgers — Envy (jack cheese and green chilies/hatch peppers) Glutton, (three types of cheese, lettuce, tomato, pickles, grilled onions and mushrooms and bell pepper and jalapenos, bacon, mayo and ketchup and mustard and barbecue sauce on a double meat full pound burger — this actually exists under another name at a local burger joint) Pride, (classic burger with mustard, onions, lettuce, pickles, and tomato and choice of cheese) Pitchfork, (meat, bacon, cheese, tobacco mayonnaise, jalapenos, hatch peppers, and red pepper slices) Vanity, (chicken sandwich with cheese, lettuce, tomato, sprouts, and a slight dab of mayo and mustard) and the Fatted Calf. (half pound burger with nothing on it, condiments are optional) And how about a sandwich called the Pentagram. (Cabrito on sourdough with onions and a Mexican sauce) One more — their main wireless provider should be Cellular Soul.

    1. Oh. My. God.
      Which come to think of it should be the name of something, too.

      I’ll need to come back to some of these. Such a wealth of ideas.

  3. Beelzeburgers (Burger joint)
    Bottled Lethe (Liquor store)
    Bright Nepenthe (competing liquor store)
    Styx & Stones (Music store with a surprisingly large classical section)
    Dante’s Inferno (Mediterranean grill, BYOB; the owner actually *is* named Dante)
    The Third Circle (All You Can Eat Buffet)
    Paper Dispensations (Bookstore; also sells stationery)
    Schismatics (Dance Club, mostly techno & dubstep)
    Wormwood Furniture Store
    The Ninth Circle Skating Rink (Ice Skating)
    The Fifth Horseman (Blues Bar)
    Lost Souls Kebab (Indian food, with a glass wall so the customers can watch the meats roasting over the Pit o’ Flames[tm] in back)
    Imperial Imp (Men’s suits and high-end clothing)
    Faust’s Fashions (Mid-range men’s clothing)
    Protean Pizza (Pick your own ingredients for anything beyond cheese pizza; they have an unearthly variety of options)
    Wheel Of Fate (Ferris Wheel)
    Leviathan (Octopus-shaped Carnival Ride)
    Into The Abyss (Roller-coaster)
    Tia-Mat (Laundromat)
    The Incuban (Cuban food and illegally imported cigars)
    Witch Doctor Emergency Care (quack-in-the-shack)
    The Seven Deadlies (Casino, if the island has such a thing; otherwise, video game parlor)
    The Golden Calf (Steakhouse)
    Stygian Suites (Seaside hotel & cabins; aging and not as fancy as it sounds)
    Last Chance Limousine Service
    Seventh Seal Center (Performing Arts & Community Theater; don’t ask)
    Rahab’s Rest (Pricey Bed & Breakfast made from a converted mansion at one end of the island)
    Motel Mephistopeles

    …I could probably keep going.

  4. Demon Rum for a liquor store. (-: I’m in awe of the Arghers’ creativity, and I’m hungry for burgers now.

    There is in Japan a “Hell’s Ramen” which consists of very spicy soup. I think it might be one of those “dare foods” — if you can finish the bowl you get it free; it’d be funnier, though, if you finish the bowl, you get one more free (-:.

    It seems to me that a vacation island would need a window treatment shop, possibly called Shades (I keep wanting to say “These Old Shades”).

    It’d be a total cliche (but an apt cliche) to have a movie theater/community theater called Orpheus or The Orpheum.

    A tanning salon called The Seventh Circle. Or a spray-tan center called The Eighth Circle.

    A phone shop called Hell’s Bells?

    Sporting good store called H-E-Double-Hockey-Sticks?

    (-: Gosh, all the hokey ones. Something, something needs to be called Fresh Hell. Maybe a deli, with devilled egg sandwiches, Hellman’s mayonnaise, devilled ham, etc etc.

  5. Oh, and the tourist information booths can all be Hellp Centers. And maybe someone always pronounces it as “helpy centers”.

  6. Devil in this Guys/Guise (dis guise) – fashion, tailors, life coaches, fitness instructors, french man
    Demon Stration/Station – transportation, pub, political party
    Pick up Styx, Fall from Heaven – online dating service
    Incu bus – Public transport
    Hellacious Acres – Public gardens, property developers,
    Bat out of Hell, I ain’t afraid of no goats, Lucy Fur – pet store, groomers
    SA Tan – Solariums
    Re Possession – car repossessors
    Satyrs – Tire shop, mechanics
    Sin(s)ister – Sister owned business
    Night Mares – livery stables
    Hey Des (Hades) – tv show
    Ruler of Darkness – surveyors
    Show me DEMONee – financial advisors

  7. Hellacious Acres – Retirement Village
    Verrine’s Terrines – Deli
    Leviathan, Big and Tall – Clothes shop
    Purson ality Futures – financial/futures trading
    Precipisatan – Weather station
    Snackrifice – Fast food joint
    Hell Toupee – Wig shop
    Santa’s Lexdysia – Bookshop, tutors

    1. Bonfire of the Damned – Dam (as in lake) that has a light show in the evening. Appearance similar to sterno flame or brandy soused plum pudding set alight.
      Bonfire of the Vanities – Cosmetic store
      Limbo lambada – Nightclub
      Vanity Fair – fairground/circus/little tents selling things
      Voo Dos – Hairdresser
      Lost in Limbo – Cocktail
      Tartarus Sauce – Food item

    2. Dagnabbit, wrong noun listed. I meant a twist on malapropism not dyslexia for Santa e.g. Santa’s Mall a Propism ala Mall of America.

  8. The Primrose Path – perhaps a garden centre, or children’s clothes? Or a pancake place: the yellow would work. Dutch-style pancakes with all kinds of savory or sweet fellings.

  9. PentaGran – Some sort of business/a cappella singing group consisting of 5 grandmothers
    Exorcise those Demons – gym
    Hell Fires – Barbeques
    Your Sole is Mine/Save your Sole – cobbler, podiatrist
    More than Soul – Band that plays jazz, punk, rock, etc
    Sole Arium – Day Spa

  10. Shoe store — the Devil’s Footprints
    Backroom brothel — Lilith’s
    Lamp store or astronomy supplies — Morning Star
    Divorce Attorney — No Greater Fury
    Place to wire money — Hell to Pay
    Daycare — Raising Cain
    BDSM shop — Hell Bent for Leather

  11. Also have one diner or grocery store or something called something perfectly ordinary, like MacTavishes and be ignoring the whole thing. Places like that always have one thing that doesn’t. For extra points, have it run by demons. Hell To Pay, the payday loan place, is run by joking normals, The Lemon Tree Cafe is owned by that sinister Mr Lemon…

    1. I love this.
      I also thought that since the park is only about fifty years old, and older business would just have a regular business name.
      But I love the idea that the humans are the cheesy ones and the demons just want to fit in.

  12. Horns & Pitchforks (Gardening Supplies)
    Blasphemous Rumors (Local Newspaper)
    Sun of Perdition (Tanning Parlor)
    Tempting Souvenirs (T-shirts, mugs, little devil statues, postcards, etc. etc.)
    Demonic Possessions (Competing souvenir store)
    Wicked Spirits (Liquor Store or possibly a bar)
    McDonalds (There’s always a McDonalds. There’s even a McDonalds in downtown Hell. It’s staffed by imps and the air conditioning doesn’t work, but the food is indistinguishable from what you get at any Earthly McDonalds.)

  13. There’s a thrift store I know called the Klassy Korner. One way to up the kitch factor is to mispell things.

  14. You people are so funny!

    Might be a bit of a stretch but a sign/printing shop called “Just Sign Here” ? Root Bank?

  15. How about a microbrew root beer called “Root of All Evil”? Remember too that any business with the name Fury in the business name will fail quickly, as hell hath no Fury.

  16. I love what everyone has come up with. So fun. Adding a few more for consideration…

    Eternal Flame Wedding Chapel
    Charon’s Ferry Service
    Lucifer’s Libations (for bar or liquor store)
    Banshee’s Bakery
    Brimstone Burgers
    Brimstone BBQ
    Brimstone Burgers & Barbecue

    It appears I got hung up on the Bs. πŸ˜‰

  17. Hmmm, everyone’s submissions are so good. Here’s me trying this out: Rosemary’s Baby-Sitting Service. And Rosemary could be completely oblivious to what the name of her business entails.

    Faustian Bargains could be a good name for pawn shop.

    Ammit’s Defibrulators and Pacemakers is kind of funny, but perhaps a bit too niche.

  18. Ok, this is only a half baked idea: based on how neighborhoods are laid out, they correspond to one of the rings per Dante’s Inferno? This is assuming there’s a Taylor-type person running the tourism office

    1. The town’s too old for that, but maybe the amusement park?
      Although now I’m thinking that maybe that should that be the seven deadly sins, although I’m not sure how that would work out.

    1. I’m loving all of these so far, but the two that have honestly made me laugh out loud are Motel Styx (took me a minute to get that one) and BeelzePub.

  19. Come Hell or High Water Plumbers

    (I wait for suggestions, he seems done, I hit send, and then he has more ?)

  20. Devil’s Advocate, a professional corporation Attorneys at Law (that really should have occurred to me sooner)

    The Devil You Know, private investigators

  21. Wow, I am not as creative as the rest of you. This is impressive stuff.

    All I’ve got is that I used to live in Melbourne, where there is a perfectly ordinary bar called Full of Grace. Underneath, accessible via a hidden door (you have to find the right book in the back hallway to pull on to open the damn thing) is a very plush red and gold speakeasy/ burlesque-style bar called Fall from Grace. Upstairs they sell beer and wine, downstairs, cocktails.

    1. I love this idea. I’m going to visit this bar when I’m next in Melbourne.

      Have you been to Polly Bar in Fitzroy? It looks like nothing amazing from outside. When we first saw it we thought it might be a garden or homewares store that had shut for the night. Then we opened the doors. Low lighting, red walls, unusual seating, Pre-Raphaelite paintings, Art Nouveau lamps and sculptures. There are a gazillion cocktails and including ones called ‘Dead Men tell no tales’. It sounds similar to Fall from Grace. The perfect atmosphere for Jenny’s book, unless she prefers to go with a chrome, black and very modern different kind of sexy setting.

      1. I spent a very drunken bachelorette party at Polly a couple of years ago. I just found out State of Grace (got it wrong the first time) and Fall from Grace are temporarily closed while the building’s being remodelled, so they might be in a different premises when you’re there. It’ll be on the website.

        If you liked Polly though, you’ll probably really like Eau de Vie, in the city. It’s down a dim alley with no sign (look for the fancy door handle), but the inside is gorgeous and the cocktails are great. They also have one of the best whisky selections in Melbourne, and do paired cheese and whisky tastings on Tuesday nights.

        1. Thanks for the recommendation. I’ve just looked it up and they’re also in Sydney, which is my neck of the woods. Yay!

          While Polly has a crimson bordello feel, Eau de Vie, appears to have a saloon, leather, tobacco vibe.

          1. Yes, it’s got a sort of private club/ speakeasy feel about it. It’s the kind of place I can imagine having a drink with the devil, maybe making a deal…

            And I envy you being in Sydney. I miss it so often, I really should just move back there.

  22. The Devil’s in the Details, a car detailing place

    The Dentist

    Devil May Hair Salon

    (This car game has spread to another car)

    BBQ Pits of Hell

    Horny, another gentlemen’s club

    Brimstone Bakery

    1. I love the simplicity of Horny. Very straightforward, doesn’t beat around the bush.
      *gigglesnort* That idiom is apropos. I’m sorry; I’ll see myself out the door.

    1. I think a lot of towns have those.

      So if I’m going to put Wiccans in here as one of the only sane religious group in town, what would they call themselves? Their church? (Not asking in context of the post here, I mean what a real Wiccan group might call themselves.)

      I’m also thinking they know the Nature Preserve better than anyone. But I’m still cogitating.

      1. I think Wiccans use covens? Though I think that may be just certain sects. I know my coworker is Wiccan, but she’s very low-key, solitary in her practice–she doesn’t go to big gatherings once a week or anything.

        1. Yes, wiccans meet in covens, for those who work in traditions or form non-tradition working groups. They also work solitary and participate in larger organizations. Also, covens can be a part of a Tradition, which is similar to a Denomination or Sect. Traditions can be anything from a loose set of shared practices and code of practice to something very formal and structured, with specific rituals for use for situations and specific sources for tools and signifying jewelry items.

  23. Wiccan’s Wicker – shop that sell Wicker Furniture

    Wiccan Church – Earthbound/Elemental Transcendence, The Summerland,

  24. You could really go to town with your Wiccans depending on which pagan belief system they follow. You could have more than one coven following Celtic, Norse, Hindu, ancient Egyptian or other pagan beliefs. Some covens have pretty ordinary names like Columbus Pagan Society or esoteric names like Sacred Grove of Yggdrasil, Sacred Circle of Isis, Path of the Horned God, The Coven of the Triple Goddess. If they tend to congregate in the same part of town their neighborhood could have a nickname, like The Grove or The Spiral or something.

  25. After deep consultation, my sister and I recommend:
    Lucifer’s Fall, a water flue ride or drop ride at the amusement park;
    Shrieks of the Damned, karaoke bar;
    Lethe Behind, lost and found;
    Seven Seals, bookstore;
    Mark of the Beast, tattoo parlor;
    Cain & Abel, family therapy;
    One Way Tickets & Travel, travel agency;
    Hotel California, because;
    Prints of Darkness Photography;
    Instadamn, social media platform;
    Bobby Flayed, celebrity chef;
    Old Nick, barber shop;

  26. Beelze Bulbs (Garden centre), Nether World (obgyn), Dam Nation (Hydro-Electric Engineers), The Shades (sunglass hut).

  27. I can’t believe it took me this long to get this one — a pet store called Hell Hounds and Black Cats.

  28. All inspiration has temporarily deserted me but you might be interested in Hell pizza?

    They’re a New Zealand wide franchise and have a demonic theme to most of their food names (i.e. they have pizzas named after the seven deadly sins).

    They tend to get a few angry letters from the more religously minded and they used to pin them up.

    1. Hi my daughter. In Auckland used to get Hells pizza they were great. If you ordered two or more you would get a small one free, that one was for me!!

  29. Wow. Just wow. I didn’t get over yesterday (because BBC America is running a Dr. Who marathon) and see what happens when my back is turned?

    Your fans are amazing (and a tiny bit scary).

  30. You need the band Styx under entertainment. They’re a real band that’s been around for at least 2.5 decades. I know they are still touring.

  31. A few more ideas for amusement park attractions. πŸ˜‰

    Highway to Hell (Racetrack or go cart ride)
    The Dead Zone (Fun house/maze)
    Devil’s Tower (Maybe haunted hotel or elevator drop ride.)
    Fearsome Fire-Eaters (Entertainment)
    Freaky Flame Throwers (Entertainment)
    Hellbent for Handbags (or Hats) – store

    Maybe for the town…
    The Hot Spot (bar, club, diner)
    Hotter than Hell – (BBQ Diner)

  32. Run Like Hell …….,…….. treadmill gym
    Hell of a Life …………….. gated community or upscale seniors lodge
    Sympathy for the Devil…charity goods shop)
    Satan’s Spawn ……………. daycare

  33. I didn’t read through all the comments so don’t know if these have been mentioned…

    Hell Hound Kennels
    Hell-Firehouse (local fire department)
    Brimstone Masonry (could they buy their headstones here, too?)
    Devil’s Detailing (car detailing)
    Inferno Florist or Fiend Florist
    Bad Spirits or Evil Spirits (competing bar)
    Sizzle Tans (tanning)
    Hell’s Nails (nail salon)
    Satan’s Salon and Spa
    Face Your Inner Demons (Not sure if this would be a yoga studio or a therapist’s office)

  34. Late to the game, but I want to play too, so here are a few more thoughts:

    1.) Fleet Street Barber (run by a human Sondheim fan or an unsuspecting demon who doesn’t get the joke?)

    2.) The Dark Army Surplus

    3.) The Four Horsemen Stables

    4.) Olde Nick Knack Souvenir Shop

    5.) Beastly Butchers

    6.) Paradise Lost and Found (located in/near Micki’s HELLp Center, perhaps)

    7.) Devil’s Foods (a grocery store?)

  35. You might need something normally named because the person wanted to stand out from the demonic hordes. πŸ˜‰

    But my bit – Brimstone Dry cleaners.

  36. The Devil’s Cont (r)act – Optician/Sunglasses
    Between the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea – boat hire.
    Bubble, bubble, toil and trouble – Cocktail Absinthe style

  37. Sympathy for the Devil (worst ever therapist, or possibly a Swedish massage parlor that’s a bit painful)

    The Devil Went Down to Georgia — travel agency — also, sister cities might be in Georgia, and possibly the former Soviet Republic.

    Devil-Tree/Deviltry — a tree nursery

    The Pits of Hell — waxing salon

    (-: These are so addictive, and reading all the comments has been quite cheering!

  38. Ill will – funeral home or thrift shop like Goodwill. (I’ll show myself out.)

    The devil’s own day spa & retreat

    Reign in hell – (I’m thinking of the poorly paraphrased line from Paradise Lost -“better to reign in hell than serve in heaven”) I was thinking a gutter repair service.

    Elysian Fields – Community supported farm.

  39. Mephistopheles — Flame-grilled Steaks and more
    Mephisto’s Bar
    Satanic Wursts
    Fallen Angel Boutique
    Brimstone Bakery

    That’s it for me today!

  40. Hades Villa, B&B with a lot of hot activity going on. CAN’T wait to read another story of yours. Have enjoyed everything since Temptation!

  41. Most of the Wiccan groups I’ve known have been the something-something circle, or some sort of coalition or gathering (if they’re a bit more varied in flavor). Admittedly, it’s been a while since I’ve been around those groups, so the naming conventions may have changed.

    On a tangentially related note (and also because it’s hilarious), here’s the Adam Ezra Group with The Devil Came Up To Boston:

  42. Dorian’s Soul Train, which takes tourists for rides around the Lake of the Demon (see astronaut Scott Kelly’s magical photos from space of this Lake in Tibet πŸ™‚

  43. Seen on a bulliten board, window of a metaphysical shop, or other proper locations: Attention all Witches and Wise Folk. Are you feeling stuck or like your connection to the goddess and her lord is not moving forward? Need some intensive introspection time in a structured environment? Sign up today for the seminar, “No Rest for the Wiccan,” a high intensity ritual and guided meditation experience that starts at sundown and progresses to the next day. Participants will experience a powerful state of being that transcends the body’s infirmaties to bring new understandings to the mysteries of life and our place in it. To sign up for this powerful experience contact the Sacred Flame book shop and gift store to reserve your spot. Space is infinite, but participation in this transformative night is limited. Remember to ask for “No Rest for the Wiccan” when you call, text, or email so you don’t lose your spot.

  44. Polter Guest House
    Hieronymus Bosch Art Gallery
    Cult Nursery and Garden shop
    Forked Tongue Concert Hall / Elocution Lessons
    Needs Must Driving School / Bumper Cars
    Hindmost First Aid Station
    Beggar on Horseback Riding School
    Details Home Organization
    Dr. I.N. Cubus Sleep Center
    Gorgon Hair Salon
    Jinn’s Pet Store / Familiars Pet Store
    Puck’s Skating Rink
    Prints of Darkness Photo Shop / Art Gallery
    Goblin’ Up Goodies Food Imporium
    Old Scratch Antiques
    Pan Demonium Kitchen Store

  45. Sod ‘Em and Go Back For Morrah–all you can eat buffet that is very welcoming and has tiny pillar-shaped salt and pepper shakers

    The Nine Ring Toss–Inferno-themed fairway game, with the goal to be to capture the Satan figurine in multiple rings and “bind” him

    The Nine Circles Ride–a teacup type ride, more because I always thought all that spinning was very hellish than any real inspiration


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