On the Road: The Cherry Con

I know, I haven’t been here. Well, it’s been hectic. The Cherry Con was an absolute riot, including the part where Rox brained herself on a table trying to throw something at somebody, and the part where Rachel brought chocolate from England which I’ve been eating myself sick on ever since, and the part where we all put on boas and glasses with red lights in them and tiaras and basically diva-ed ourselves into hysterics. It was a lot like a three-day-long kid’s birthday party. The flamingo head-boppers were also a hit.

I had a party for the Cherry Forum mods on Wed. night–they work for free, the least I can do is give them a party–and Wolfie has been spoiled rotten ever since. He keeps waiting for fifteen women to show up and tell him he’s a gorgeous boy, and all he gets is me saying, “Get out of the trash.” The mods more than earned their keep by putting together Gaffney’s pony, a joke that got out of hand as usual because none of us knows when to quit. Gaffney introduced me to her agent, and I e-mailed her to thank her and said, “The next time we’re together, I’ll buy you a drink. And dinner. And a pony.” And then I saw this pony on Amazon and thought, “That would be good” and ordered it and then waited until the mod party to put it together. Everybody loved the directions that said that in order to insure the child had a “magical experience” when being introduced to the pony, it should be assembled ahead of time because when you open the damn box, all you see is a headless pony. It gave me pause, I can only imagine what it would do to a three-year-old. Then it had to be assembled and the mods did that while drinking wine and other things, and then we turned it on and it started to move, and I’m here to tell you that pony is freakishly realistic. And large. And while I was trying to figure out how to get it to Pat, Molly volunteered to drop it off on her drive east, so she did that yesterday, stunning Pat and freaking out her dogs. So my work is done, thanks to the mods and especially Molly, who took this picture:

Pony Road

And in the space when we weren’t partying at the con, Krissie and Lani and I worked on Dogs and Goddesses (we decided the sequels will be Cats and Gods and Pharoahs and Ferrets) and went to IHoP and Hobby Lobby. They’re both insane for IHoP but they’d never experienced Hobby Lobby before. They’re now making plans to drive here the next time so they can take more stuff with them on the return trip. We also watched a couple of episodes of Pushing Daisies which is my favorite show since Olive sang “Hopelessly Devoted to You” and told Chi McBride that what he’d just told her wasn’t the Truth Bus, it was the Bitchy Crosstown Express. And Lani had never seen Big Trouble in Little China, so we made her watch it, and after that she walked around the house saying, “Son of a bitch must pay” and my personal favorite, “Sorry, sorry, just thrilled to be alive.”

That was the good news. The bad news is that I cleaned the house for the mod party, but ran out of time so I gathered up everything that I couldn’t put away and put it in, you guessed it, the office. Which once again looks like hell. But I’ll fix it. And the rest of the house looks great. Or it will once I get all the chocolate wrappers out of the kitchen. So there really isn’t any bad news. Just the occasional bitchy crosstown express.

So that’s where I’ve been. Chocolate, IHop, ponies, parties, Hobby Lobby, Pushing Daisies in Little China, and many brainstorming sessions. And good times were had by all. Really, what more could anybody want?