Mom (in the dining room over her second glass of wine): Who wants ice cream for dessert?
Sweetness: Marcy was on the playground and Zach grabbed her–
Light: With chocolate sauce!
Mom: WAIT. Zach grabbed her what?
Fake Aunt Jenny: And then he didn’t know what to do with it.
Mom: Sweetness, nobody is allowed to grab your anything.
Sweetness: What else would they grab?
FAJ: Anything you’ve got that’s squooshy. Boys love squooshy.
Mom: Boys are insane for squooshy. That’s all they think about until they’re older.
FAJ: That’s all they think about until they’re dead. Continue reading